My trust and feeling of safety in my co-therapist is being severely shaken at the moment. Since becoming aware that she is very well known in the DID professionals arena I have watched as her name is being dragged through the mud on the sites I have access to on the internet.
We all know there are non-believers in DID. We all know some people think all memories recovered are planted by the therapist and the concept of alters is iatrogenic. But some people go so far as to say professionals who fight for the awareness of DID are part of a ‘cult’ who are thriving off the fact they can diagnose patients with DID and guarantee their pay check for years and years to come.
According to many people online my co-therapist is a huge part of this ‘cult’. My co-therapist is someone who is being highly accused of planting memories of RA in their clients.
I don’t think the people who are mouthing off about professionals that they don’t know and have never met think for one second about the fact their clients can access their gibberish. And don’t we have enough confusion and unsafety of our own already? They clearly aren’t sprouting this shit out of concern for the people that are under them, that is for sure. There is no concern shown at all. Just bitter remarks made by intellectually intelligent people who can write with an air of importance and righteousness.
But the things I have seen written about my co-therapist is going a long way in my overall feeling of unsafety at the moment. It feels ‘dirty’ to have her in my life, to have sessions with her and give her access to my mind. I keep washing that dirt off, with the help of Cat, but the paranoid thoughts soon creep back. And no wonder. I am being indirectly told that my co-therapist is going to absolutely ruin my life and has ulterior motives for wanting to support and care about me.
Although, on that note, and it just goes to show how little these haters know, I pay my co-therapist pittance. And at the moment I pay Cat enough for her to pay for the room we see each other in and that is it. So if the therapists who believe in DID are doing it for money they have chosen the wrong group of people. A lot of DID’ers, though certainly not all, are low functioning. So they do not have a job and certainly cannot afford the high prices these haters think they are paying to fit their little theory.
The therapists involved in these shambles are aware of it. Cat often has to deal with my little crises of confidence when it comes to trusting the safety of who she trusts to support me alongside her. Everyone is aware of how toxic these people are and how dangerous the game they are playing is.
I just think thought needs to be spared for the clients who are watching this debacle from afar and having their mind contaminated by the beliefs of strong willed and callous people. At the end of the day it is the clients that are the victims of this little hate parade. And I cannot stress enough: we have enough to deal with on a day to day basis, in therapy, and outside of it. We do not need this crap taking up our headspace and making us wonder if we are nothing but victims in a professional psychotherapy ‘cult’. Any idea how triggering that notion is?